We weren't done yet.

My Grandma Bertha Ebig passed away last night around 2am. My deep, mournful sobbing at 5am gave way to a hopeful, but somber morning. She lived 80 wonderful years. She raised four sons, including my father, who I love so much. I'm not shocked, I'm not asking the "why, God, why?" question, I'm just sad. Deeply, truly, mournfully sad.

I wasn't done. I wasn't done hearing her signature laughter/clapping mixture, being smacked on the arm three times, or seeing the joy on her face when she interacted with her first great grandchild, my son, Elliott Milton.

I just wasn't done having her in my life.

I feel regret that I did not go to see her in the hospital last week. I feel heartbroken about not physically seeing her ever again. The last time we were together, though, we played Scrabble with my Mom and Meredith (Meredith beat us all soundly...) and laughed and had a wonderful time. She was so full of life, love and laughter that day, I know it is best that that is my last memory of her face, her presence, her hug.

My Grandma's signature saying was "We're family." And her passing means we get to live out what she loved best about life in her honor. I get to see my sister Melanie who I ache to hug every day. I get to see my Uncle Brian and his family from California, who I want to meet Elliott so badly. We all get to be together again; it's a tribute to my Grandma and the strong family ties she has left behind.

I'm also going to take this opportunity to have Elliott baptized. It's something I've been meaning to arrange for for months now, but I wanted my siblings to be there, I wanted to have the ceremony at St. Thomas where we were married, where I was bapitzed and had my sacraments. I should have made arrangements around Christmas time, but no regrets now.

When I called my Grandma Natali to ask how she was doing, she was quick to mention it. She told me she prays for Elliott to be baptized every day. Well heck, Grandma! If I would have known that I would have had my butt in gear a long time ago.

Anyway, there will be joy and grief next week when we all come together.

I know I'm a bad blogger, but this crazy job of mine keeps getting in the way of my Web 2.0 time. Things are changing at work, I'm taking on more responsibility while still trying to get my previously assigned work done. I'm managing an amazing student intern, Laura, who I am so proud of and feel like I am making an impact on her professional skills.

Elliott is WONDERFUL. He is a rasberry-making, quick-crawling, stair-climbing, food-eating, trouble-seeking, super-babbling baby guy. I'll try and post some pictures soon. He is SO big. Crawling so quickly, and moving quickly from standing up to cruising around our living room furniture. He still hasn't caught kitty Runa, but lots of close calls. He loves being outside, loves his Daddy, and is so playful and fun. He is a blessing.

Lots more to say, but it's going to be a long (short) week.

My Grandma visited the blog a few times at my parents' house. She referred to the internet as "that dot com thing." Oh Grandma, I miss you already.